I am not going to tell you about any of the most exciting things that happened at Paris fashion week. I have nothing to say about Bananarama singing He Was Really Saying Something as a live accompaniment to the glitter-bombed finale of the Sonia Rykiel show. Zero hot takes on fashion’s ongoing love-in with Stranger Things, which saw 15-year-old actor Sadie Sink (Max in the second series) make her catwalk debut for Japanese streetwear label Undercover. I am even going to spare you my first-person account of the hype-gone-wild scrum outside Virgil Abloh’s Off-White show, even though I have a purple bruise on my leg from being knocked to the ground. You will notice from the photos that I have deliberately not picked out the Insta-bait activist-chic slogans at Balenciaga or Christian Dior.
Let’s forget all of that, and focus on what Paris fashion week means for what we are going to wear. There is so much to see at fashion week that this can be obscured, but it is – surely – still kind of the point. Fashion weeks should inform you about whether you need to persevere with socks and sandals (spoiler alert: no) and whether the midi-skirt hemline has sufficient legs to justify buying another one (yes). It should give you a steer on the pieces to dig out of storage (anything in black leather) and the quick-win accessories that will keep your look current (oversized earrings). I am as intrigued by the possible future directions for fashion suggested by flight-of-fancy catwalk and front-row antics as anyone, but I also need to find out whether next season is about a rounded or pointed toe before I buy any more shoes.
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