'Walk into a party wearing OTT sunglasses, and half the people there will write you off before you've opened your mouth. You've typecast yourself as a baddie, just like that'
Should you ever want to character-assassinate yourself, you can do this with the help of one simple accessory. All you need to look like a tosser is a monster pair of sunglasses. Walk into a party wearing an OTT pair of shades, and half the people there will write you off before you've opened your mouth. No need to go to the trouble of formulating and voicing offensive opinions: you've typecast yourself as a baddie, just like that.
Today, however, I will attempt to defend the indefensible. My goal is nothing less than the rehabilitation of power sunglasses – the unnecessarily large, deliberately expensive kind.
The benefit of big sunglasses is that they are a no-effort way to turn up the volume on your summer wardrobe. A serious pair of shades packs a lot of attitude, and this can be turned to your advantage if you want to make your summer wardrobe more punchy. Much easier, in hot weather, than adding high heels, and with just as much added glamour. And a pair of shades isn't just a low-maintenance addition – it's positively time-saving, because you can skip eye makeup.
This summer's most on-trend sunglasses are boxy, squared-off shades that seem to channel 3D specs. There is nothing particularly face-flattering about them, but they are unmistakably Fashion. Aviator styles, by contrast, were an off-beat vintage classic two years ago, but, having been discovered for their cheekbone-enhancing properties, have become slightly Wag. Wear square shades to edge up a flirty dress, or aviators to make the utilitarian more alluring.
The classic vamp-it-up shades are the big, curvy, movie-star kind; the "who does she think she is?" sort. If you are trying to look approachable and down to earth, these won't do you any favours. But if you're trying to ratchet your look from normal to reasonably glamorous, there is no faster way. A pair of these transforms a subtle, demure look into a statement of Grace Kelly intent. Key word here: intent. To harness the impact of sunglasses without turning the world against you, remember you are not, actually, Grace Kelly, but just wearing large sunglasses. That way, you get to look like the star, not the baddie.
• Jess wears dress, £1,055, by Rochas, from matchesfashion.com. Sunglasses, £320, by Linda Farrow, from brownsfashion.com. Sandals, £45, riverisland.com.
Hair and makeup: Tonee Roberio using Mac Cosmetics.